Viral TikTok Puts Bride on Blast for Asking a Bridesmaid to Pay $20K to Attend Her Wedding

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Receiving a wedding invitation in the mail is an exciting moment, but it comes with a big price tag—especially for wedding party members and those invited to destination nuptials. When one bridesmaid realized that the cost of attending her best friend’s big day was nearing $20,000, she asked the bride to rethink some of the costs. The bride, however, wasn’t willing to compromise. After posting the text exchange between them on TikTok on June 15, 2024, the post has gone viral with over one million views.

In the first screenshot, the bridesmaid’s text warns the bride that she might not be able to afford her wedding and the ensuing festivities and attire. “With the outfits and trips we are nearing 20k which is basically my student loan payment,” the guest messaged her friend. Instead of declining the invitation altogether, the woman proposed a solution. “I know how special you want this day to be but is there any way we could reconsider some of the events and clothing?” she asked the bride.

The post also includes the bride’s response, which appears unaccommodating. “Uhm sorry to say but unfortunately not really,” the bride answered. “And I did lay this out in my bridal party pdf. I’m not sure why it’s such a surprise.” Since the bride isn’t willing to budge on the itinerary or dress code, she demands that the bridesmaid figure it out—no matter what it takes. “I’d ask you to please find a way to make it happen, you know?” she wrote. “It’s once in a lifetime.”

Instead of giving her friend permission to opt out of some of the pre-wedding events, she asked the bridesmaid to use her high-budget American Express card to pay for the affair. The bride also suggested taking out a loan that Timmy—presumably her fiancé—would lend her. “I can ask Timmy if he has anything he could loan you with a little interest if that helps?” she said. “Maybe like a 20K loan? Would need to be paid back.”

Before giving her friend time to respond, the bride quickly moved on to the next topic of conversation: her bachelorette party. “Are the girls planning something special to gift me at the bachelorette party?” the bride continued. “Just want to make sure you’re thinking of it!!!!” After uploading the series of text messages, the bridesmaid shared her feelings with TikTok. “Im seriously trying here besties but you might be right that I have to end this friendship but I don’t want to :(,” she captioned her post.

The TikTok community agreed that the cost of the bride’s wedding was excessive. ”20k is actually INSANE,” the most-liked comment said. “No best friend would ask you to go into debt for their wedding.” And many shared that demanding her bridesmaid to acquire the cash was unreasonable. “Taking a loan for SOMEONE ELSES wedding is obscene,” someone wrote. Others pointed out that the text about her bachelorette party crossed the line. “And then to ask you to be sure she’s getting a gift on TOP OF THIS?????” another person asked. “Girl. RUNNNN. Lose this ‘friend.’”